Calling Me Sugar

Been listening to this song by PINK over and over again today. I love everything about it. The words, the melody, the emotion, the meaning it has for me, and the raw truth of it all. So if you haven't heard it, look up "Glitter in the Air" and have a listen. It's simply beautiful. Here are the lyrics:


Have you ever fed a lover with just your hands?

Close your eyes and trust it, just trust it

Have you ever thrown a fist full of glitter in the air?

Have you ever looked fear in the face

And said I just don't care



It's only half past the point of no return

The tip of the ice burg

The sun before the burn

The thunder before lightning

The breath before the phrase

Have you ever felt this way?



Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone?

You're whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone

Have you ever been touched so gently you had to cry?

Have you ever invited a stranger to come inside?



It's only half past the point of oblivion

The hourglass on the table

The walk before the run

The breath before the kiss

And the fear before the flames

Have you ever felt this way?



There you are, sitting in the garden

Clutching my coffee,

Callin' me sugar

You called me sugar



Have you ever wished for an endless night?

Laugh so the moon and the stars and pulled that rope tight

Have you ever held your breath and asked yourself will it ever get better than tonight?

Tonight

Good Times

Tonight my good friend Marjorie came over to watch Lost and just hang out. I met Marge in 1998 in the Hoogle Hall dormitory of Westminster College (I seriously can't believe I have known this wonderful woman for 12 years now as it just doesn't seem possible that it has been that long since I first started college) and we have been great friends ever since.

Marge was my life saver during college. I was missing home, my parents, my friends, my at-the-time boyfriend, and basically the all-around life I was comfortable with. So many things had changed in over the course of one summer: I graduated high school, I packed up my life, I moved to Salt Lake, I started college. Marge represented the promise of a big smile, a contagious laugh, a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, and security in a non-judgemental friendship. I honestly believe there are certain people you meet in life at certain times for one specific reason: you need them. I needed Marge, more than I even realized at that time, but I'm able to look back now and understand just how important it was that she entered my life during that difficult time.

During our many crazy nights in the co-ed dorms where we lived, we ended up hanging out in the lobby with the guys. Marge and I seemed to gravitate more to them than the girls. To be honest, we had some really fun and down to earth guys living on our floor, while the girls seemed to be more up tight, prissy, and mostly consumed with impressing the guys. Marge and I weren't like those girls. We were comfortable in our own skin and could have a good time just being ourselves. Looking back now, I think the guys appreciated that and felt more comfortable hanging out with us than the other girls. Marge and I ended up developing some really great friendships with a lot of them, too.

One of the many crazy things we liked to do was record ourselves being silly. I had a hand held tape recorder at the time, that I used to record lectures in my more difficult classes so that if I wasn't able to take notes fast enough or missed something in lecture, I had it captured on tape... That was the main purpose of me having the tape recorder, but really it became more of a means of entertainment for Marge and I. We recorded everything. Every stupid little hang out session, conversation, laugh, etc... Don't ask me why, it was just something we did.

Tonight when she came down to visit me, she brought a tape of one of our "poetry sessions" with her. Let me explain...We used to do random poetry readings in southern accents. These were spontaneous readings if you will, and usually were created based on the name and character of someone living on our floor. For example, my college roommate's name was Loraine, so a poetry reading might go something like this:
Loraine,
She lived in Maine
She's not very plain
She's kinda of insane
But we love her all the same
Loraine.

Creative eh? LOL (you are probably rolling your eyes this very second, but trust me, our poetry readings were a combination of late nights, being silly, and trying to save ourselves from the day in and day out homework routine). Hey, it kept us entertained.

Anyway, back to the point. Tonight Marge came over with one of these tapes. Lucky for her, my Audi has a tape player in it so Marge, our friend Dave, KeeLee and I all climbed into the car and listened to the tape.

We laughed and laughed and laughed. And it brought back great memories for me. Memories of how fun those difficult college days were. Memories of how silly we could be and yet have a wonderful time. Memories of how important those college days were in helping to shape the person I have become.

If you ever have the opportunity to go back in time be it through a recording, a picture, a year book or a phone call to an old friend, DO IT. It's like chicken soup for the soul, and you might just find a little piece of you that you didn't even know was missing.

Thanks Marge! Thanks for the crazy nights then, and the one we had tonight. I enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed those spontaneous "poetry readings" in "noon-a-maker" with the "beater stick" and thanks for being the wonderful friend that you are! Love you :)

What's Worse?

Being the one who leaves or the one who gets left behind?

If you ask KeeLee, it's the being the one who gets left behind. I see little sad eyes whenever I grab my car keys and mention the phrase "You have to stay, baby." Breaks my heart cuz she wants to go for a ride in the car so bad. Sometimes she even jets out the door before I can stop her and waits by my car as if this time will somehow be different.

This week Michael is in D.C. giving a speech on an audit he did as well as attending the National Auditors Conference. He left this morning at 7:45 and won't be back until Friday and I'm already going stir crazy. Granted, he'd be at work right now anyway if he were here, but at least I know that means he's coming home at 5:30. What am I going to do till Friday? I HATE being bored. HATE IT!

That, and I miss him. I already did the whole Michael is 3,000 miles away for the first year and a half of our marriage, but it seems that every other month he's got some work trip to go on. Since January alone he's been to New Orleans for two weeks, St. George for a week, now DC for a week and then we're looking at another week long trip in June followed by yet another one in July. I really don't like it all that much, but I guess that's the life of a fancy schmancy Homeland Security Auditor.

That's What You Get for Waking Up In Vegas

Last Thursday, Michael and I hopped in the car and took off for Vegas. No, it wasn't a spontaneous trip, but I like to make it sound like it was :)

We needed to get the hell outta dodge for a bit, and this little excursion was pretty affordable. Plus, our friends Jeff and Melissa were going as well so we figured we'd join in the fun.

The good things about Vegas:

The people watching is out of this world.

Never in my life have I seen so many crazy skanks take a roll of plastic wrap and try and make a dress out of it. I'm not kidding either. I saw so many coochies and ass cheeks hanging out of thread bare material, that by the time we left on Sunday, nothing would have shocked me. I had been de-sensitized. There were even women with some women who looked normal in shape and size, but once you got a side view, you were like "How did she get that ass in those pants? Run from across the room and jump in?" Seriously. It was unreal.

There were celebrities. Jeff sat down to play black jack at the Wynn, and apparently was playing cards with Michael J. Fox. Although disguised in a hat, sun glasses, and jacket, the rumor was out. And Jeff also mentioned that the shakes gave it away. (Not trying to knock the Fox, but Jeff said he really did have the shakes).

And in addition to Jeff's sighting, I almost ran smack dab into Stephen Mayor (for those of you who watch True Blood, I'm referring to Vampire Bill Compton, Sookie's one and only love). Yeah, at the MGM trying to walk amongst the sea of people there for the big boxing match, and who do I almost knock over. Fantastic. (I hear that Conan O'Brian -my favorite late night show host EVER- was right next door to the Wynn at the Encore having lunch. Didn't see him, but we we probably shared the same oxygen at some point considering it's very limited out there with all the cigarette smoke and all.

The weather was good enough to sit out at the pool. Although it was super windy, and it wasn't as warm as we were hoping for (only got up to about 70 degrees), it was still nice enough weather to enjoy being outside and taking advantage of the pools at both the Wynn and the new Hilton Grand Resort. I didn't get much of a sun tan, but hey, we were sitting up in Salt Lake freezing our butts off in the snow so I can't complain. Here's a picture taken from the pool side table where Michael and I enjoyed lunch Friday afternoon:

La Reve was amazing. This is the new show at the Wynn and it is flippin fantastic. There is not a bad seat in the theatre and I really mean that. It's a theatre in the round, and there really isn't a stage, it's a pool. I can't even explain how amazing it was to watch people dive, swim, do acrobatics, dance, and on and on and on. They did it all, and between the costumes, the music, the talent, the effects... it was my favorite part of the entire trip. Security was really strict about taking pictures during the performance, but after the show ended, I was able to snap a few shots. This hardly does it justice but for what it's worth...

We had some awesome food. If you like Italian food, (more specifically, Chicken Parmesan) then you must try Maggiano'sLittle Italy when you are there. It's located right across the street from the Wynn, and is located on the second level of the shopping mall mecca. It's easy to get to, but if you plan on eating there in the evening, stop by earlier and make a reservation. Otherwise, you might be waiting a while.

Other fun things included the Body's World Exhibit at the Luxor. Melissa and I went to that while the guys played Black Jack. We tried the buffet at the Wynn (you have to try at least one buffet while in Vegas, but I gotta say, the one at the Bellagio is by far the best). We also took advantage of the free drinks, playing the new Sex In the City slot machine (I didn't win any money but every time Melissa sat down to play something, she did) and have I mentioned the people watching was fantastic?

Speaking of people, while enjoying some sun at the pool at the Wynn, we almost ran right into Melissa's ex-fiance. What are the odds right? (If I ever said "what are the odds" in Vegas, you'd think it would be because I was winning a billion dollars, but no... not the case).

The ride home sucked. We had to add an extra two hours to the trip so we could stop in Price and pick up KeeLee but boy was she the happiest puppy ever. And I was glad to have her back.

All in all, it was a quick little excursion but not one I'd consider relaxing. Vegas takes a lot out of you. Between the walking all over, the drinking, and the exhausting people watching, Vegas is kind of a cracked out vacation. And after about two days, I'm kinda done being there. Thank goodness our next trip is going to be Hawaii. I don't know that the people watching will be as good there as it was in Vegas, but I know the weather will be awesome, and so will the beach :)

Still

These lyrics sum it up for me. You can always count on a good Tim Mcgraw song:

There's a place I wanna to go

Where I can hear the cotton grow

Midnight train whistles blow

A dozen miles down the road

Adn all I have to do is be still



There's a place I need to be

Mom and Dad my brother and me

First time I ever saw the beach

Back to 1983

And all I have to do is just be still


When the road gets crazy

And tries to break me

And I've had all I can stand

I can close my eyes no matter where I am

And just be still



There's a place I need to go

Where stained glass windows glow

Every part of me is known

Thank God I can go there

Thank God I can go there

Still